Episode Transcript
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CBS Tonight Academy Award-winner Kathy Bates
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Five Casino. Um,
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before we get to New York, did you guys get
14:51
your twats con tickets? And see, I
14:53
just got another sweet message. So I can't say
14:55
everybody's mean. Julius has texted me. He told me
14:57
you loved me. I
15:00
know it's been a tough few days for me. I love
15:02
you too, buddy. Um,
15:05
well, Sy and Uba head to the Hamptons.
15:08
Uba's boyfriend wants her to move in. Uba
15:11
said, or? I
15:15
don't think so. I
15:17
think sometimes when
15:19
you're in a relationship and you're just
15:22
at that point, like you're on the cusp of
15:24
like what the next step's going to be. You
15:27
can kind of put it out there
15:29
in case it doesn't work out. You
15:32
like have, like you want to like have
15:34
your escape routes. But this
15:36
was the boyfriend from last season, right?
15:40
This is the one. Yeah. I mean, I
15:42
think. I exposed not. Was it Sy or
15:44
was it brand? Sy, right? Sy. I think
15:46
it was Sy. Like they were
15:48
at the Halloween shop. Yeah. And it was mad
15:50
about that. Yeah. Um,
15:52
but that boyfriend, I don't
15:55
even want to talk about him because we're not going to see him. Well,
15:58
he's building her an art room. that
16:00
made me wish that I could be
16:02
artistic in any sense of the word.
16:05
Rebecca, Bryn, Jessil, Sy, and Uba
16:07
arrive. The
16:10
first thing that happens is Erin
16:12
says that Raquel
16:15
was upset because Sy
16:20
and Uba didn't offer her to
16:22
ride in the front seat, and so
16:25
she couldn't ride with them. All
16:27
ready, I'm done. I know.
16:30
I have a question. Was this
16:32
like everybody was supposed to go on the
16:34
helicopter, and then people are like, peace out,
16:36
I ain't going, peace out, I ain't going,
16:39
I'm going to drive. It was so weird
16:41
that people were in cars, people were in
16:43
helicopters. I just felt like the
16:46
plan was everybody getting a helicopter, we're going
16:48
to fly in, we're going to have the
16:50
drone, we're going to get all the money
16:52
shots. And then most of the
16:54
women are like, I'm not getting in the freaking
16:56
helicopter, but of course, Bryn and Jessil were like,
16:58
I'll get in. I wouldn't have got in. You
17:00
saw the fog. Hell no.
17:04
I probably would have gotten in. I don't
17:06
get in helicopters anymore after the Kobe accident,
17:09
rest in love with it. Gosh. Well,
17:12
there's a lot of things to say here. One, Erin's
17:15
kitchen does look exactly the same. She's
17:18
got a waterfall edge. I don't know if she
17:20
had that before. That's the only thing I noticed
17:22
was different. When they showed the two, when
17:25
Jessil was talking about like, oh,
17:28
I think she has a different faucet. And then they
17:30
showed the same faucet, but one was hooked and one
17:32
was not. I was like, I'm like, is that the
17:34
same one? I'm so confused. I had to go, I
17:36
had to like press the little button back and I
17:39
was like, I'm
17:41
not one for interior design, but I'm pretty,
17:43
yes. I think the backsplash
17:45
might be different and the tiles different,
17:47
but what was different is that there
17:49
was food. But
17:54
my other question is if Raquel gets
17:57
carsick and needs to sit in the front seat
17:59
or drive or whatever it may be, why
18:01
didn't she just ride in the car with
18:03
Jenna? Isn't that her friend? I was just
18:06
thinking the same thing. Could you imagine if
18:08
she barf delivered Jenna's new Bentley? True.
18:11
But also why don't I? Nobody wants somebody
18:14
in their car that has this car sick.
18:16
Do you get carsick? I do. Oh, you
18:18
do. Yeah. And like long car
18:20
rides, I do. So I drove
18:22
today up to Big Bear and we left like
18:24
at 630 in the morning, I mean, Sophia and
18:26
the dog and the cat all in one car.
18:29
And that was delicious. I can tell. I know.
18:31
And I'm like, I'm so happy you don't get
18:34
carsick, Sophia. I'm so happy. Ryan
18:36
used to get carsick. Ava gets carsick. Well,
18:40
he is the worst driver ever. So
18:42
Caden was in the car with him and he got carsick going down
18:44
the mountain. Well, he thinks he's like
18:46
a race car driver, but he has like that
18:48
big lifted truck. So it's like, well, it depends
18:51
on the car for me. But I
18:53
also want to know why all
18:55
of these women have lost their sense of humor.
18:58
Like no one can take a joke.
19:00
Everybody's taking everything so seriously. Like
19:02
at the end of the day, we're talking about
19:04
sandwiches and getting carsick. Like why are we this
19:06
worked out? I'm
19:09
not going to lie. What? This
19:11
episode was a little. Try
19:15
hard. Pick me. Yeah, it was a little slow.
19:18
It was a little dry. It was a little
19:20
dry, dry. Like I didn't see any fun other
19:24
than getting a Christmas tree outfit, which
19:26
wasn't that fun to me? Because at that point
19:28
I was like, it
19:31
was bugging me because listen, we
19:33
get it, Jenna Fucking Lyons, you're rich. Aaron
19:36
spoke out of turn and said that she
19:38
had to pay for your Uber. But like
19:41
now I don't need you to shove it
19:43
down my throat every episode. I know you're
19:45
rich. We got it. What I need to
19:47
see is Jenna
19:49
Fucking Lyons pay the two
19:52
hundred fifty dollars back to Aaron. I want to see
19:54
the cash. The ones here. Oh, you want to make
19:56
it rain, make it rain. Yeah. And
19:58
here's your money. Yeah, money.
20:01
Only for a $250 Uber for Peter's sakes. He might
20:03
have been going from. The Hamptons to New York. The
20:05
Hamptons to New York had to have been. Well,
20:08
then Bren and Sai said to talk.
20:10
Bren says she's sorry for everything she's
20:12
done to hurt her. Sai says Bren
20:14
never heard her and is brushing her
20:16
feelings aside. Sai says that
20:18
Jenna told her that Bren said she hates her. Bren
20:21
calls Jenna over and Jenna says she never
20:23
specifically called out Bren, but then we see
20:25
Jenna be like, this one over here. This
20:27
one over here. But I guess she could
20:29
have been talking about Jessel. It
20:32
would have been great if she was talking about. She hasn't
20:34
done anything else. I'll see that.
20:37
Yeah, just has been a little MIA, but I'm with
20:39
Sai on this one because Jenna is acting like she
20:41
didn't nod. She didn't insinuate.
20:46
She didn't do this and
20:49
she's just kind of gaslighting her. Jenna
20:52
is giving me. I'm
20:55
doing a lot off camera and not
20:58
and trying to keep my hands clean
21:00
on camera vibes. There's
21:02
a lot of housewives like that. Yeah.
21:05
Bren says everyone in Jenna's life has told her that Sai has
21:07
talked shit about her and then
21:09
the two end up hugging. But
21:12
then a size says
21:14
something that I also noticed when
21:16
it came to Aaron and Bren's
21:18
argument, which is how condescending Bren
21:22
is being this season. Which
21:24
I don't know. I know. I
21:27
know. I'm like, I love you, Bren so much.
21:29
I just saw her in New York and
21:31
she was so sweet and came in and hugged
21:34
me and everything. But
21:36
maybe she feels like this group ain't given
21:38
it. So she's trying to do the most.
21:41
Sometimes that happens. Yeah,
21:43
I know. I feel like I know someone
21:45
that happens with. Yeah. Oh,
21:48
me? He's wearing pink. He's wearing pink. In a
21:50
bath, leg, shop, hat. I know. I
21:53
haven't even had a shower. I don't even have one stitch of makeup
21:55
on. I'm like, I'm in my, I don't give a shit era, I
21:57
think. I only have
21:59
makeup on. because I had to do an ad before this.
22:02
But then Erin and Jenna give the women gifts.
22:05
Jenna gives Jessel something and a Bottega
22:07
Veneta bag and it's a Christmas tree
22:09
costume. I feel
22:12
like Bronwyn from Salt Lake would have been
22:14
like, ooh, it's couture. I know.
22:18
Oh my God. I wanna get a
22:20
hot dog and a Christmas tree costume. But
22:22
I also wanna- You can for the live
22:25
show, you can wear one. Oh, sweet. By the way. Do
22:27
you wanna be the hot dog or the Christmas tree? I
22:29
wanna be the big heart. You
22:31
guys, have you bought your tickets? Buy
22:34
your tickets. Get your tickets.
22:36
Listen, we don't even mind if you heckle us.
22:38
Oh, know what I think also we should
22:40
do is discuss how pissed I would be if
22:43
you gave me something in a Bottega Veneta
22:45
bag and then it was a $12 Halloween
22:47
costume. Like,
22:50
I don't need a switch and bait like that.
22:53
Like, don't hurt. Like, did you see how happy
22:55
Jessel was that she thought she was about to
22:57
get that purse? She's like, I
22:59
know. She was like, yes, she's making up
23:01
for that ugly lingerie she gave me last
23:03
year. And then she's like,
23:06
here we go. I would have gotten pissed at that. But
23:09
then the women go out to dinner. Raquel
23:12
shares her engagement story and shows
23:14
her giant ring. Bren
23:16
says she wants to be a lesbian so
23:18
badly. Jessel talks about Raquel's ring,
23:20
how it looks like it came out of
23:23
like a arcade candy box or whatever. But
23:25
then we get to Rebecca's story. I
23:28
forgot Rebecca was there because she was so over
23:30
it in the chopper, but she's
23:32
there and now she's telling stories that
23:34
make zero fucking sense. About
23:37
her virginity? Well, she moved to New York
23:39
at 18, fell in love with a
23:41
guy, moved in with him. He then kicked her
23:43
out and she had nowhere to go. So then
23:45
she tried to get into her old apartment of
23:47
where her ex-boyfriend had already moved in, but then
23:49
she lost her virginity at 16. Her
23:51
parents said if she didn't do drugs, they would give her
23:54
birth control bills. Rebecca,
23:56
I just met you. Would
23:58
you give your 16 year old though.
46:00
Yeah, she was. Yeah, she shook
46:02
her freaking brain out. She was
46:04
like Elaine on Seinfeld. She's
46:09
really just getting into it. But I
46:11
love that George is just randomly there
46:13
at the dance class. I hate
46:16
to brag, but I've been to one
46:18
of those dance classes. Like a
46:21
hip hop one? No. In
46:23
Utah, those are like a big thing.
46:25
They're like workout dance classes. They're big
46:27
in the LDS community. Like I have
46:29
been. Oh, really? Yes. And it's like
46:31
this workout and it's the same thing
46:33
every time. But they're like add a
46:35
couple of different moves. I was
46:37
like, why were you there? Because
46:40
I had girls that, well, I have girls
46:42
that worked for me at
46:44
all in that are LDS. So
46:46
when I went to Utah, they were
46:48
like, let's do this workout class. And
46:50
they all already knew the dance. And
46:52
I was like, oh, no. But
46:57
yeah. Then
46:59
they talk about Lisa in the
47:01
low blow and that Heather
47:03
says she needs to get to the root
47:05
of Angie coming after her. Do you think
47:07
Angie's comment was valid since Lisa brought up
47:10
Electra first? I
47:14
don't think that she meant it to be
47:16
like that. I don't think she meant to
47:18
like insult her as her
47:21
speaking about her child. It's just
47:23
like. You don't think she was trying to get her back for saying
47:25
something about her? Maybe.
47:28
I don't know. Are you talking
47:30
about when she says whenever
47:32
I'm talking to you, you're like, oh, Electra's
47:35
calling or something like that. Is that what
47:37
you said? But then Angie kind of made
47:39
a comment back about Lisa's parenting. Oh,
47:42
about her son playing gaming
47:44
all night. Yeah. And then
47:46
there was something else that was said this
47:48
episode. But yeah, I do think she did
47:50
that to get that. Yeah, it's tip for
47:52
tat. Yeah. And by the way, I have
47:55
kids that game. It doesn't make
47:57
you a bad parent because your kids game. Well,
48:01
we also can't forget that at the beginning
48:03
of this episode, we see Lisa telling her
48:05
son to stop gaming. So they put
48:07
it in for a reason. Yeah. Well,
48:10
I think we all do that. You know, Spencer's older
48:12
now, but he used to in high school, he liked
48:14
to stay home. He's like me. I
48:16
don't. Yeah. Well,
48:19
I mean, my kids like to get that the other
48:21
day I walked down, not even gaming. Slate
48:23
is doing her homework and she has
48:26
on outer banks like on her iPad.
48:29
And I go, what are you doing? Like you're
48:31
doing your math. And she goes, it helps me
48:33
focus. Really? I
48:35
choose I have multiple things going on at once. And
48:38
then I like went on because now you can check
48:40
your kids like report cards throughout
48:42
and she's like in advanced math. She's getting an A
48:44
and I'm like, well, then do I just let her?
48:47
I don't know. I don't know how to help her
48:49
with that. As long as she's getting A's like, I
48:51
was like, all right, well, let me know what happened here.
48:54
Did race pass away or is he good? I
48:56
was you need to watch out of banks. So
48:59
good. But I'm still on This Is Us.
49:02
I know I'm on episode
49:04
season five now. I
49:07
think the show is making me emotional and thinking
49:09
about my childhood and things like that. It's
49:12
crazy. Yeah, it's I mean, a lot
49:14
of people have said that. Then
49:18
we hear from Adam Whitney's friend. He calls
49:20
her and says the person
49:22
who posted that prism jewelry
49:24
comes from Alibaba. I
49:27
have a question. Yes. Is
49:29
this up and Adam? I
49:32
don't think it's up and Adam. Is it? I
49:34
have a feeling. Let's listen to up and Adam's voice. This
49:37
up and Adam because it's a podcaster known as
49:39
Adam. What do you think about
49:41
all these podcasters and people
49:43
like Jeff Lewis and content creators
49:46
all getting so involved in Housewives
49:48
that, you know, it's not
49:50
uncommon. It's actually uncommon. If we watch a
49:52
Housewives show, we don't see a reality T
49:54
or one of the most posts.
49:57
Well, I mean, it pisses me off. every
49:59
time because it should be two T's in
50:01
a pod, no matter what. Like where are
50:03
we slacking? No, we're not shady enough. No.
50:07
I don't know about that one, but Adam
50:10
reached out to the account and found out
50:13
information came from someone in Whitney's friend group.
50:15
I love that he's like, they wouldn't tell
50:17
me who. But I said, do
50:19
they have a beauty line? Do
50:22
they have a jewelry line? But he said,
50:24
they said you can ask questions and I'll
50:26
answer them. Do you
50:29
have an alcohol line? Does she have an alcohol
50:31
line? Is it? Yes, she does. Does her name
50:34
rhyme with Risa? Yes. Yes.
50:37
But we're not going to tell you. I
50:40
know. I don't know. I feel like the it's
50:42
I don't know. I don't know if
50:44
I like all these fan accounts
50:47
that are on social media with
50:49
the DMS or the DMS and
50:51
get involved in Housewives. Like
50:53
we're seeing them on TV. But I guess
50:55
you know what? It is real life, right? It
50:57
is reality because. That's what's
51:00
happening. That's what's happening. Yeah.
51:02
I have my favorites. Yeah, we all
51:04
do. Then Brittany
51:07
and Jared meet. Jared says he thought
51:09
everything was good before the Milwaukee trip.
51:11
And then Lisa FaceTime him
51:13
off her phone. Brittany says in hindsight,
51:16
she shouldn't have let Lisa do that.
51:18
Brittany is upset because Jared won't publicize
51:20
their relationship and is still in dating
51:22
apps. And then Jared said he's done
51:24
everything he can do in this relationship.
51:26
They decide to put a pen in
51:28
it. Don't get me started.
51:32
Be my girlfriend, but I'm not going to get off dating
51:34
apps. Yeah, be my girlfriend. But
51:36
I'm not I'm going to let go of your
51:38
hand when I walk by other women. Well, pretty
51:40
girl. Oh, and I'm
51:42
a really good guy, Brett. I'm like,
51:44
if you have to tell someone you're
51:46
a really good guy or I'm not
51:48
a liar and things like that, you
51:50
probably are. What about when he said
51:52
I will even kiss you in public
51:55
sometimes? That is
51:57
so fucking much, Jared.
52:00
I like, no, thank you. I
52:02
really want to be like, Brittany,
52:05
Jared is not that into you. But
52:08
I know we haven't been getting mad at
52:10
Brittany because she was sharing her text messages
52:13
with Lisa and Lisa was responding, which is
52:15
kind of funny. But I'm not over the
52:17
fact. Here's the problem. Jared could honestly do
52:19
anything at this point. I wouldn't like him
52:21
after all those tweets and things
52:23
that he wrote about, like, not
52:26
a happy camper. I said we had
52:28
to be friends. I got her on the show like Jared,
52:30
if you got her on the show and you wanted to
52:32
be a part of it, you were not going to come
52:35
in as her best friend. You knew she couldn't handle it.
52:37
Like, no, anyhow. So
52:40
they're definitely not together anymore.
52:43
I'm sure they'll get together and not get together a thousand more
52:45
times. He just is one of
52:47
those, you know, he said he's private. He didn't
52:49
want those text messages. Yeah, because there's other women.
52:53
Or is he going on
52:55
the show? Like, what is his point of
52:57
going on the show? Because the fame nobody.
52:59
Yeah. Yeah.
53:01
Because just because he
53:04
is related to the Osmonds doesn't mean anybody
53:06
knows who the frick he is. Do you
53:09
like how I say frick frick? You're
53:11
not saying the F word anymore. Yeah, apparently I
53:14
moved on. Nobody knows who he is. So
53:16
he's like, okay, I'll help
53:19
this trick that I'm best. I
53:22
hate when they go best friends, but
53:25
like really we let stop. Stop it.
53:27
If I do this to you, Tam,
53:29
I mean it. I honestly punch me
53:31
in the face. I want to know
53:34
how close he is to Donnie. I
53:37
want to know if he was on
53:40
claim to fame if Donnie would actually
53:42
make a like video thing or not.
53:46
Anyways, then Bronwyn and Gwen discuss
53:48
what she wants to do about
53:50
her father's parents. I think this
53:52
scene is pivotal and a
53:55
lot of people relate to it. I think that her. not
54:00
liking the tone of the message from
54:03
her grandparents that she hasn't met made
54:05
a lot of sense. Yeah, I this
54:07
scene was really sweet. I really liked
54:09
it. The, you
54:12
know, was I don't know if this
54:14
scene or the scene prior where Bronwyn was explaining how
54:17
maybe she was talking to Lisa about how she got
54:20
pregnant was in school. Yeah.
54:23
And then they wanted her to kind
54:25
of go away. Yeah, that actually happened
54:27
to a girl, a Mormon girl in
54:29
our school. In our, in my high
54:32
school. Yeah. We had a very large
54:34
Mormon community in Glendora, California. And
54:36
one of the girls got pregnant. And
54:38
she was just like, the sweetest like
54:40
little goody two shoes. And
54:43
she was cheerleader and all that. And all of a sudden
54:45
that she was just gone. She was gone one year. And
54:47
then it came out that she
54:49
got pregnant, had a baby and put it up
54:51
for adoption and came back to school the following
54:53
year. Yeah, I think it's a pretty common story
54:55
when that, when you get pregnant young. Um,
54:58
but I think
55:02
they both were very open in that moment.
55:04
But then we get to Heather, Lisa, Brittany
55:06
and Mary go zip lining and then sit
55:08
for lunch. Brittany tells Lisa she's upset with
55:10
her for talking to Jared on her phone.
55:14
I like
55:16
what Aspinter says what? Seriously?
55:19
I mean, come
55:21
on. Stay out of her. Stay
55:24
out. You gave her your phone
55:26
and you saw that what she
55:28
was doing. And then to say
55:30
you're obsessed with my relationship. She's
55:33
done multiple years telling her stuff
55:35
about her relationship. Like I, I
55:38
have to tell you, I really
55:41
don't like that relationship. Whether they're friends,
55:43
best friends, or I don't
55:46
like it. And I also don't
55:48
like when I gotta
55:50
be really honest when I
55:52
don't want somebody's opinion on something
55:54
I don't share. Right. Like
55:57
I really am only going to share if I
55:59
want your phone. feedback. So Brittany, if you're not going
56:01
to listen to what anybody has to say, why are
56:04
you sharing? Unless you're saying I
56:06
just need comfort or give me
56:09
support, but she's not saying that.
56:11
She wants everyone to be like,
56:13
Jared's great. Jared's not great. Brittany.
56:15
Yeah. Just like I'm talking to
56:17
Brittany about coming on the pod.
56:22
So I want to, I need to know we need to get
56:25
her phone and start texting this guy. Yeah.
56:27
Well, hold on. Should I slide into his
56:29
DMS and see if he takes the bait.
56:32
Catfish. What's it called? Catfish. Well, it's
56:34
not catfish because it's actually me. I mean,
56:37
it would be Matt, but I
56:39
mean, it would be. Have Matt
56:41
use somebody else's Instagram. No,
56:43
it needs to be me. Like we need to know
56:45
like, if he doesn't even, if he's
56:47
just ready to go all the
56:49
time. How about if we just text him and go, hey,
56:51
we'd love to have you on the podcast. He'd be like,
56:54
yeah, I'm sure he would. Oh,
56:56
another, another private guy that doesn't want to be.
56:59
Yeah. I hate, I hate the attention. Oh, stop
57:02
it some more. Stop it. But I got
57:04
you 4,000, four dozen roses
57:06
and a unicorn stuffed animal upon
57:08
your arriving home from filming, but
57:11
I don't want any attention. Mary
57:15
was activated. Yeah. Mary
57:20
questions. Why? Well,
57:22
Lisa says Angie is not going to been a good
57:24
friend to her calling her a bad mom. Mary questions
57:27
why she didn't address Angie about it.
57:30
And then Mary questions why Heather
57:32
champions Lisa, but not Angie. Mary
57:35
says Heather leaves a trail of
57:37
lies, black eye championing body positivity.
57:39
I mean, she, she went in
57:42
like Mary was not holding back
57:44
at all. Well,
57:46
also, I think they're and then calling
57:48
her two faced, but
57:50
like the multiple times that Mary
57:52
has referenced things about
57:54
Heather's body. Yes,
57:57
that Roger happens live when she had on the
57:59
talked about her. Gucci bustier. I didn't know they
58:01
made it in size 14 or something
58:03
like that. Yeah, she did that. She did
58:05
it on the show. She's multiple times talked
58:07
about. But if anybody's going to get away
58:09
with it, Mary's going to get away with
58:11
it. If you and I said something like
58:13
that, we would be like, oh my
58:15
God, did you imagine? No. Run over my
58:17
truck, backed up, run over again, back up,
58:20
run over again. I
58:22
think because Mary is like, you
58:24
know, certain things, it appears
58:26
like she's like, whoo. So
58:28
people give her kind of a pass.
58:31
I mean, because she is funny and she has
58:33
levity to it, but I could see if I
58:36
was Heather, I'd be like enough. Yeah.
58:38
Like, what do you care? But
58:41
Heather is how I look. Heather is
58:43
playing both sides of the fence. Yeah,
58:46
she wants to be liked by both people. And
58:49
she's not she's not getting into the mess of
58:51
it. Like she's not talking shit all over my
58:53
face if we're in person. Tell me
58:55
if I broccoli in my teeth, like always tell me
58:58
how could they not be laughing? I would have been
59:00
laughing my ass off. But
59:02
that was a lot. There was like seven
59:04
different conversations to not like it wasn't like
59:06
it was for a second. Like I kept
59:08
being like, oh, it's still there. No one.
59:10
And they had napkins there. People were wiping
59:13
their faces like it just like you got
59:15
a little shit on your lip, but also
59:17
when a clean could have even been like,
59:19
hey, like Clark could have been like Heather.
59:21
They were fucking with her, I think. Damn,
59:24
I thought for a second it was
59:26
another bruise from filler. I at first
59:29
I thought that too, then she had
59:31
smear on her forehead. I'm like, nope,
59:33
that's dirt. Oh, my God. I
59:35
was shocked that Mary went zip lining. Mary's
59:38
doing all the things like I like zip lining. I do
59:40
it all the time. I did it on the Disney cruise.
59:43
Yeah, Mary is handling business. She
59:45
is. But I thought
59:47
it was a good episode overall. Scenes
59:50
for next week look good, too. So
59:53
thank you guys for tuning in to another episode of
59:55
Two Tees in a Pod. And we'll
59:57
talk to you guys soon. Bye.
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