Episode Transcript
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0:00
So we supposed to start the
0:02
podcast. Ready?
0:07
1, 2, 3. Shut
0:12
up. Welcome. Welcome to
0:14
I've had it podcast where
0:16
we are a place for open minded
0:19
thinkers that like to traffic and
0:21
petty grievances as the Patriots
0:24
and the Gaytriots know the star
0:27
of our show. Her name is Pumps. My
0:30
name is Jennifer and
0:32
we just like to welcome you here
0:34
today. Right Pumps. Welcome to I've had
0:36
it podcast. That was
0:38
a newscaster voice. That was really good. Thank you.
0:40
Kind of sexy. I'm
0:43
too sexy. I see a lot of
0:45
comments on YouTube. I think
0:47
you have a lot of people that have
0:50
crushes on you. Really? Yeah. Well,
0:53
maybe I should take a little look.
0:55
Yeah. You need to do a little looky-loo. Little looky-loo.
0:57
I thought you and Kylie were going to bet it
0:59
though. Make sure I don't
1:01
pick it. We'll do that in our spare
1:03
time. Okay, Kylie. It's my understanding that you
1:06
found some rather alarming stuff on
1:08
the internet. I do. I have
1:10
an article that someone on Patreon sent me. Okay.
1:13
And it's titled, a church
1:15
is going viral for selling
1:17
plots of land in heaven for
1:20
a hundred dollars per square meter.
1:23
And the caption says, a Christian church
1:25
is turning online for selling these plots. The
1:28
pastor says he spoke to God and
1:30
he was granted permission to do this.
1:33
They have already collected thousands and thousands
1:35
of dollars. And I
1:37
just want to note on the ad, it
1:40
looks like they take Google pay, Apple
1:42
pay, all major credit cards. Is
1:50
that where we are now? That's where
1:52
we are. Here's the thing.
1:54
That is not new because
1:56
I know in all my
1:59
Scientology documentary. They
2:01
keep bank accounts for
2:04
your next life. So
2:06
you give them money and they put it in a bank
2:08
account for your next life. They just hold on to it
2:11
until you come back in your next
2:13
life. So selling plots in
2:15
heaven is right on par.
2:18
What I think when I hear that is,
2:21
okay, we got a huge grift going on, but
2:24
the bigger problem is the people buying them
2:27
that actually think that
2:29
that's legitimate. That's where the
2:32
real problem is, don't you think? Of
2:35
course. I mean, it's
2:38
so unbelievable that
2:40
people are buying non-existent
2:43
land and that there are
2:46
ads for it and there's a payment system
2:48
for it. And there's no
2:50
oversight for this. It's just
2:53
jaw-dropping that somebody, believe somebody
2:55
that says, I
2:57
got permission from God to start
3:00
selling land in heaven and
3:03
you can buy your land from me.
3:06
Right. God said it was
3:08
okay for me to sell you these plots. I
3:11
mean, it's jaw-dropping. Another
3:14
little tidbit from all my
3:16
cult work. The
3:20
Mormons, they're quote unquote prophets. They
3:22
always tell the people, I talked
3:25
to God and God told me,
3:27
like, so that, I
3:29
mean, it's like, if you're in that
3:31
kind of world, like
3:33
if somebody walked up to me and said, well, I talked to
3:35
God and God said that I need
3:37
to buy you lunch, I would be like,
3:39
that's fucking weird. But if you're indoctrinated to
3:42
it, it doesn't seem as weird. I've
3:44
told you about that girl that
3:47
used to, like babysit across
3:50
the street for me. Yes, the flowers.
3:53
Yes, God told me that I got flowers
3:55
at my front door and
3:57
I open them and there's a note. me
4:00
to send you these flowers. And
4:03
I'm just like, this is number
4:05
one, that conversation never took place.
4:08
And if it did 100% it didn't. schizophrenia.
4:11
Number two, somebody needs to get you
4:13
help, right? You need help. Like
4:16
if this is your way of like,
4:18
trying to recruit me to be a part
4:20
of your religion, it has failed miserably.
4:24
And like that stuff, like grifting these
4:27
people, I guess you're just
4:29
so far indoctrinated into all of this
4:32
shit that you think. But
4:34
here's the thing, and I'm gonna have a hot take
4:36
here. My opinion, there's
4:39
no difference from selling imaginary
4:41
plots of land. And
4:43
these mega churches that have
4:45
billions of dollars untaxed that
4:48
are still asking for money, right? It's the
4:50
exact same thing. The other just
4:52
sounds so much more obviously a rip
4:55
off, right? Where these mega churches that
4:57
have 95 branches across
5:00
the United States and take VIMMO
5:02
and have one preacher that does
5:05
everything online and they take in
5:07
hundreds of thousands of dollars
5:09
every Sunday, if not millions.
5:12
That's a total rip
5:14
off as well. So I guess a
5:17
human beings ability to
5:20
enable clear scam
5:23
artists and rip off artists is
5:26
jaw dropping to me. But the
5:29
preachers offer this, like God
5:32
will favor you if you do this.
5:34
And here's the deal. Everybody's
5:36
broken. Everybody makes mistakes.
5:38
Everybody has bad thoughts. Everybody tells
5:41
a white lie. That's a part
5:43
of the human experience. These
5:45
mega church people have figured out how
5:48
to profit off of the human experience.
5:50
So in that regard, it's kind of brilliant,
5:54
but it's immoral. It's
5:56
completely immoral. I don't know
5:58
how these people. asleep at
6:00
night knowing that what
6:03
little they're contributing to society and
6:05
how much they're ripping off their
6:08
flock and have amassed
6:11
all of this obscene wealth.
6:13
A massive. And you know, a lot
6:15
of these churches during the COVID
6:19
shutdowns got PPP money. Oh,
6:22
really? Oh, yes. Millions
6:24
and millions of dollars of PPP money
6:26
when they have the surplus of these
6:28
massive bank accounts, Catholic Church,
6:30
mega churches all applied for PPP
6:33
money. And think about how disgusting
6:35
that is that they don't pay
6:37
taxes. Yeah, that's the
6:39
biggest grift. The no taxes. Yeah. So
6:42
I mean, it's not that's egregious to
6:44
me that selling plots, imaginary
6:47
land. But I'm just going
6:49
to say, I think what these a lot of
6:51
these churches are doing to their flock to
6:54
try to make them feel better for
6:56
the human experience, for making mistakes,
6:58
for lusting after somebody, for finding
7:00
somebody attractive. Maybe somebody had an
7:02
affair. All of these
7:05
things are, you know, hurtful in the moment,
7:07
but they're not they don't make you a
7:09
bad person that you can tie your way
7:11
out of. Right. There's not
7:13
a there's not like a bounty. Right.
7:16
For forgiveness. I was just thinking
7:18
if I put that on
7:21
Instagram or whatever, whatever the platform was and
7:23
I said, I'm going to sell you this
7:25
land. If
7:28
I didn't have the land, that would be a crime.
7:32
So the church has
7:34
an exception because I
7:36
mean, I would think that would be a crime.
7:38
Like if you were on if you or I
7:40
were saying yes, by these imaginary plots, if
7:43
somebody would be a crime fraud.
7:46
America's greatest legal mind at work.
7:48
I mean, right here, the Patriots
7:50
and Patriots today, you are getting
7:52
your money's worth. This is worth
7:54
the time because counselor pumps is
7:57
identifying crimes. She's identifying exceptions. and this
7:59
is why this podcast is one of
8:02
the greatest podcasts in America. That's right.
8:04
For the Patriots, for the Gaytriots. Top-notch
8:06
thinking right here. Yep, and I just
8:08
want to throw one more thing out
8:10
there. These churches,
8:13
I guarantee you the
8:15
people that are selling
8:17
the make-believe land in heaven have
8:21
a very anti-gay,
8:25
anti-woman rhetoric from the pulpit.
8:27
Oh, I'm sure. Can rest
8:29
assured. And so how
8:31
these people are able to skirt what
8:33
every other business has to do, which
8:35
is pay taxes, when
8:37
they have institutionalized bigotry.
8:40
And this is what is so sad,
8:43
is gay people are born into
8:45
religious families and
8:48
their religious communities and their
8:50
religious families reject them for
8:53
being who they are. So I've had
8:55
it. I mean, up to my eyeballs,
8:57
as everybody knows, from the architecture to
8:59
the grifting, from the make-believe land. I
9:02
think that religious
9:04
extremism is a cancer in
9:06
this country that hurts society
9:09
and doesn't help. I
9:11
just, I, there are a lot of
9:13
people that have a faith that is
9:15
reality-based. They don't take the Bible literally,
9:17
and they genuinely want to
9:20
put a better footprint for themselves without any
9:22
expectation that somebody believed the way they were.
9:26
And there's a lot of people that I know that are like that,
9:28
and I don't take issue with that. But
9:30
with the sanctimonious, I'm on the moral high
9:32
ground. The gays can't get married. You can't
9:34
be gay. We're going to pray the gay
9:36
away. Women can't have babies out of wedlock.
9:38
You have to submit to the husband. All
9:40
of those people fuck
9:44
you. Agree. Pumps,
9:48
our ability to suck and then wake
9:50
up the next day and suck more
9:52
than the previous day is undefended. It's
9:55
unparalleled. We are the champions. If you would like to see
9:57
how bad we suck, we'd love to. Please
10:00
join us in Seattle in September
10:02
or New York City in
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November for you know Just some
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world-class shit-talking. That's right live live
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We've done your homework. We've
12:31
got some voice memos today. Oh, God. So,
12:33
we will start off with Ashley. Hello, ladies. Ashley here.
12:36
I have fucking had it with airplanes. I know we go over this time and time again. Recently
12:38
had a trip to Las Vegas. Blah
12:41
blah blah blah blah blah. And we're going to have a live chat with Ashley. She's
12:43
going to be here in a minute. I'm going to be on the phone. She's
12:45
going to be here in a minute. I'm going to be on the phone. She's
12:47
going to be on the phone. I'm going to be on the phone. She's going
12:49
to be on the phone. She's going to be on the phone. And
13:51
then on a plane is expected
13:54
to act the same way. Everybody's
13:56
supposed to conform. And you've just got a lot
13:58
of people that are incapable of that. They're
14:01
incapable of coexisting
14:04
and being kind and
14:06
the golden rule. Treat people like
14:09
you want to be treated. They can't
14:11
do that. But I've been on planes
14:13
with people that are throwing a fit about the connecting
14:15
flight. And I'm like, dude, they're not
14:17
going to trap you on here and make you stay
14:19
for five years. I
14:21
mean, it's like everybody gets off a
14:23
plane. Yes. And I've
14:26
been the person that has the connecting
14:28
flight. And especially when you've been sitting
14:30
on the tarmac for 30,
14:32
45 minutes, because for some reason, these airports are
14:34
shocked that a plane shows up and they don't
14:36
have a gate ready for you, which is a
14:38
whole nother episode entirely, but I digress. And
14:41
I've stood up and I have a super tight connection.
14:44
Josh and I recently experienced this and I stand up
14:46
and I said, we have a connection. And
14:48
they're like, yeah, we do too. And I'm like, okay, right.
14:51
And it's just you just kind of have
14:53
to accept it. There's about a two inch
14:55
lane that everybody has to get down, right?
14:57
To get out of the hole, to get
15:00
into the airport, to go into the next
15:02
plane. But it's the people that
15:05
want to be the boss of
15:07
the exiting on the airplane
15:10
or the entrance. Like recently,
15:12
I was getting onto a flight and I
15:15
asked there was everybody was kind of in one
15:17
single file line. And I was trying to figure
15:19
out where like the end of one
15:21
group was in the beginning of the other group was.
15:24
So I asked this guy, I'm like, are you group one or
15:26
two? And he's like, I'm group two.
15:28
And I go, okay. So then I asked the guy in front
15:30
of him and I go, are you group one or two? And
15:33
he goes, I'm group one. I go, okay, I'm going to get behind you.
15:36
So then the guy behind me goes, why
15:38
are you cutting in front of me? And
15:41
I go, well, because I'm going to
15:43
board before you. But if you want to stand in
15:45
the line in front of me, that's fine. I'll stand
15:48
behind you. Right. And he goes, okay.
15:51
Yes. So Josh and I got behind him and we just
15:53
stood behind him. Because I'm like, I don't want to fight
15:55
with him. If he thinks I'm cutting, he can win. You
15:57
know, like I'm not going to, I'm not going to. I'm
16:00
not dying on this hill. And
16:02
so I let him stand in front of me. And
16:04
then he starts going with group
16:07
one. He starts going all the way through and
16:09
the flight attendant was like, sir, you're in group
16:11
two. You need to get to the back of
16:13
the line. And I
16:16
just went on, but I was like, I'm not
16:18
gonna fight with this guy about it. If you
16:21
think I'm cutting, you win. I'll get behind you.
16:23
Yeah. And here's the deal. I mean, I
16:25
know that this is kind of off point, but when
16:28
they call a boarding and they say group
16:30
one, group two, and you've got groups seven
16:32
and eight with their faces pressed up against
16:34
the line, I'm like, it's
16:37
unnecessary. Stay back. You
16:39
can't board. Why are you crowding the lane?
16:42
What about that day that we went full
16:44
blown Patriot at the airport, the three of
16:46
us? I think we've talked out
16:48
before, but it was just so hilarious. So we were
16:50
dicking off in the airport, you, me and Kylie. And
16:53
it's like, you know, the flight to Philadelphia, wherever
16:55
we were going is leaving now. So we raced
16:57
to the gate and we get up there, and
17:00
then I'm the first in line,
17:02
then it's Kylie. Then it's you and she scans
17:05
my ticket. She goes, thank you
17:07
for your service. Ha ha ha. Patriots,
17:13
Patriots. She knew immediately.
17:15
She recognized over patriotism when she saw
17:17
it. She thanked me immediately for my
17:20
service. She knew. She knew immediately the
17:22
service we're providing. She knew we're taking
17:24
back the flag. She knew.
17:27
And the eagle. Good girl. Ha
17:29
ha ha. That bird is our bird.
17:31
It's our bird. You can't have it. No.
17:34
All right, up next we've got a voice
17:36
I know from Maddie. Hi, Jean
17:38
and Pumps. My name's Maddie and I'm a really big
17:40
fan. Okay, I'm gonna jump right in. I've
17:43
had a hat at slash hit it this week. I
17:45
went to my first pride parade this year and I
17:47
posted about it on my Instagram because it was my
17:49
first time really telling the world that I'm a lesbian.
17:51
And I had a feeling I'd lose some followers because
17:53
I'm from a very conservative town in Georgia. It's
17:56
Georgia Forsyth County and that will tell you everything you need
17:58
to know. Anyways, I was- right. By
18:00
the end of the day, I lost 30 followers from
18:02
my post. I'm really not wanting to
18:04
care about how many followers I have, but what
18:06
I do care about is how many of those
18:08
followers are assholes. So I've had it with homophobes,
18:11
but here's where I hit it. At
18:13
around six unfollows, my mother was astounded
18:15
at such behavior. So she went through
18:17
and screenshotted all of my followers so
18:19
that at the end of the day
18:21
she could review and see who unfollowed
18:23
me. Her reasoning being that if it's
18:25
anyone she knows, she would like to
18:27
unfollow them. So we hit that.
18:30
Anyways, happy pride and all my
18:32
love to my two-faith lesbians, Kylie
18:34
and Pumps and lesbian adjacent Jen.
18:38
You know that when you first
18:40
started your grievance, like my heart
18:42
just pinged so hard that people
18:44
would unfollow you because you're being
18:46
who you are. And
18:48
a lot of people say, why is it
18:50
Pride Week? That's why it's Pride Week because
18:52
you put shame on them for being who
18:55
they are. The opposite
18:57
of shame is pride,
19:00
but to know that your mother went
19:02
full gangster because that's the kind of,
19:04
that's how loyal I am. I am
19:07
just like, if you vote
19:09
against the gays and do all
19:11
the shit, I'm not going
19:14
to go along with that. I
19:16
am not going along with that. Kudos
19:19
to your mom and the story ended so
19:21
well because I just, I think that right
19:23
now is a time in
19:26
American politics where people will say, I'm
19:29
just everything's so hyper politicized, everything's so
19:31
hyper politicized. And it's like the
19:34
people that are politicizing everything are
19:36
the people that don't want everybody
19:38
to have the same. Right. Again,
19:40
so quality. Right now,
19:42
we all have to speak
19:44
out for women and
19:47
for the LGBTQ plus community
19:49
at all times and
19:51
quit being duplicitous. Like seriously, do
19:53
you want a right
19:56
to healthcare and a right to privacy
19:58
or do you want rape? victims forced
20:00
to have their rapist baby. Do you want
20:02
to be able to put an IUD in
20:05
or take the pill without it being Donald
20:08
Trump's business? Then fucking vote accordingly.
20:10
If you're a MAGA Republican, you're
20:12
in a cult. If you're
20:14
a Democrat, I don't agree with everything
20:16
the Democratic Party does, but
20:18
I agree that I want human rights.
20:22
I believe that the Republicans always
20:24
wreck the economy. Just
20:26
look at the stats, Google it because they are
20:28
not good at it. That's a huge myth. I
20:32
want people that are
20:34
marginalized to stop being marginalized.
20:36
I feel that in every
20:40
fiber of my body that
20:42
you have to advocate for
20:44
the weakest, most marginalized members
20:46
of society, that that is
20:48
the most moral thing
20:50
that you can do. Kudos to
20:53
the mom in Georgia that did
20:55
a roll call, that kept receipts
20:57
and unfollowed because you know what? I
21:00
would do the exact same thing. If
21:02
I had a gay child, hell
21:05
hath no fury like the scorn
21:07
that I would put on anybody
21:09
that was cruel to my child.
21:11
I mean, I
21:13
would feel a need to love. I
21:15
don't know that I could love my children
21:17
more, but if they were gay, I would
21:19
have to dig deeper and love them a
21:21
million fold more because I would know that
21:23
so many in society are going to be
21:26
cruel to them, but not their
21:28
mom. Not their mom. They would always know
21:30
I had their back.
21:32
Oh, a hundred percent. Oh, totally.
21:35
All right, Kylie, who's next? All right,
21:37
up next we've got dress. Dress?
21:40
Dress. Hey,
21:42
Jen. Hey, Pumps. Hey, Kylie. Love
21:44
you guys so much. I
21:46
need to just say that I
21:49
have fucking had it with straight
21:51
couples showing PDA at the gym.
21:54
I am disturbed by that.
21:56
First of all, aren't you there to
21:58
work out? Second of all, nobody wants
22:01
to fucking see that. I don't even want to
22:03
see people showing each other affection when I'm watching
22:05
porn. And third, are you trying
22:07
to make me throw up in my mouth
22:09
while I'm running full speed on the
22:11
treadmill? Stop taking mirror selfies together.
22:14
Stop hugging each other. Stop kissing each
22:16
other. Stop squeezing each other in weird
22:18
places that nobody else wants to see. Thank
22:20
you and good day. Dress,
22:24
I love you. Dress is the best.
22:27
First of all, you just could have stopped the I've
22:29
had it with, I've had it with straight couples. Right.
22:32
And that just- So many things came to mind. That just
22:35
could have ended up right there. But he brings up so
22:38
many important points and it
22:40
has been our long storied
22:42
campaign against PDA.
22:46
Hate it. Here's the thing, when
22:48
it's so overt and so staged,
22:50
you know they're covering up for
22:52
an insecurity in the relationship or
22:54
some shortcoming. Had to present it.
22:57
It's a natural, you're out and about. Somebody
23:00
puts their hand on somebody's back. There's a
23:02
peck and it's not this staged thing. But
23:04
making out in the gym, here's
23:07
what got me the mirror selfie. The
23:10
couple mirror selfie. What?
23:14
Why? Do you not have mirrors
23:16
to pose for at your house? Why
23:18
do you have to do it in public? There's
23:20
just, you know how I feel about PDA. I'm
23:23
a long anti-PDAR. But
23:26
I also love, Dris said, it made me wanna throw
23:29
up in my mouth. Cause I say that all the
23:31
time. I'm gonna throw up in my mouth. Here's one
23:33
point that we have to talk about that
23:35
was probably the funniest thing I've heard
23:38
all day is that he doesn't
23:40
even like PDA and porn. I
23:43
love that. I
23:48
want PDA free porn. Yeah.
23:52
I just want an in and out boom. Yes, get
23:54
to the nut, Kat. Nobody
23:56
wants to see any French kissing. We don't
23:58
have to have a lot of. Passion right making
24:01
out. Yeah a slobber. No,
24:03
just get in get out.
24:05
I like it. That's fantastic dress is
24:07
a star All right up
24:10
next we've got Jane Hi
24:13
pumps. Hi, Jenny. This is Jane
24:15
from Texas and I've
24:17
had it with all these crunchy moms that
24:20
I'm seeing on tick-tock talking
24:22
about how they don't go to
24:24
the doctor or take prenatal vitamins
24:26
and They drink raw
24:28
milk and they eat raw eggs Because
24:31
they think it's just super trendy like
24:33
they're fucking Amish or something. I'm so
24:35
sick and tired of seeing it it's
24:37
not healthy bitch go to the fucking
24:40
doctor and Just
24:42
a side note. I'm pregnant with my first
24:44
baby and I listen to y'all all the
24:46
time and I'm
24:49
really hoping if I play enough episodes that
24:51
the baby will hear it and They're
24:54
just gonna come out a complete bitch just like me I
25:01
Yeah, you know the whole like not going
25:04
to the doctor Thing
25:07
is it's a child listen
25:09
I believe in your freedom to choose
25:11
to do that or not but I
25:13
do think there is a pretty
25:16
large body of evidence that
25:20
Modern health care has decreased
25:22
instances of death And
25:26
it's increased life expectancy and I think
25:28
this is pretty established science now within
25:30
that Are there issues with the for-profit
25:32
health care system that we have here?
25:35
Yes Are there issues
25:37
with the state-funded health care system like
25:39
the NHS in Britain? Yes,
25:42
but I I
25:44
am NOT a person that
25:46
is Capable
25:49
of thinking that I could self-treat
25:51
something That's what gets me
25:54
about it and it kind of goes back to Covid
25:57
it's the same thing. It's like I'm gonna
25:59
get on WebMD and
26:02
I'm going to read what
26:04
do you need to do with pregnancy? What's
26:06
a do? What's a don't on WebMD? And
26:08
so I'm going to say I know
26:11
better because I read
26:13
WebMD and I got on TikTok
26:16
and they're saying you could eat raw eggs. I don't know
26:18
if you can eat raw eggs when you're pregnant or not.
26:20
I can't remember. Sounds like you probably can't, but who cares?
26:23
That's not the point. The point is if
26:27
you have an illness and
26:29
you diagnose yourself on the
26:31
internet, then you have to
26:33
stick with it. Like, okay.
26:35
So it's just like the fact
26:38
you had a great idea during
26:40
COVID. Let's have a Facebook hospital.
26:42
Everybody that doesn't want healthcare, hospital
26:44
care, medical care, science for
26:47
COVID. Then you meet in the Facebook
26:49
hospital tent and you can
26:51
WebMD it with your Facebook doctors and see
26:53
where that gets you. If you're in, be
26:56
in, but don't be, I'm going to diagnose
26:58
myself. I'm going to do all this shit
27:00
from TikTok. And then when something
27:02
goes wrong, then blame healthcare. But
27:04
here's the deal. At the end of the day, you want
27:07
to do that. You don't, you want
27:09
to go it. It's a free society. And
27:11
I believe that if you don't want to
27:13
go get healthcare, you don't have to go
27:15
get healthcare. But when
27:17
shit happens, really serious shit
27:20
happens, then you decide to
27:22
honor the science. The rest of us are all kind
27:24
of like, yeah, it's kind of been
27:26
there all along. Right. It's not a mystery. Pumps,
27:34
our annual Thanksgiving trip is coming up
27:36
where you and I both take our
27:38
families to Mexico. Are you worried
27:40
about this? No, because
27:42
I know you've discovered via tour. That's
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why don't you tell the listener about
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29:01
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29:03
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30:16
right, Kylie, who's next? We're going to
30:18
play another rendition from our friend Nick
30:20
G, and it's the
30:22
Memaw remix of Like a Prayer. Nick
30:26
G's been busy. Humps
30:28
is a mystery.
30:31
My nana just wants
30:33
to bone. I
30:36
see you hit that
30:38
vape, and
30:40
it feels like home.
30:45
When you hit that vape, I
30:48
feel so fucking queer. I
30:50
touch my double D's and
30:52
shave my husky's hair. In
30:54
the midnight hour, I can
30:56
feel her power. I take
30:58
it from the rear to
31:00
show me my eye care.
31:04
I can't.
31:10
It's just the
31:13
creativity and the accuracy. Absolutely.
31:16
The husky came in, the double
31:19
D's. I think
31:21
we need to collab with this guy
31:23
and drop an album. You need to be
31:25
doing dancing. I think, you know
31:27
what? Some crazy ass
31:29
trumper drop an album. She
31:31
was, what's, Lara Trump? She
31:34
sucks. We're moderately kind of
31:37
cool. Kylie,
31:39
do you think we should drop an album? I think we
31:41
should drop an album. With him. He's the lead singer, and
31:43
Pumps and I are the dancers. Obviously.
31:46
Can't they auto tune our voices because
31:48
Pumps and I are prolific, horrible singers.
31:51
Pumps, go ahead and sing the real Like a Prayer
31:54
for the listener. I just want to say, I love
31:57
Like a Prayer. It's one of my favorites. Why don't you do a little? I
32:00
can't. Just real quick, just like a prayer. Come
32:02
on. Just like a
32:04
prayer. Your voice will
32:07
take you there. Just
32:09
like a prayer. Nick
32:19
is a 10 out of 10. I love him. We
32:21
wanted to make some theme songs. I
32:23
just, a ringtone. I hate to change
32:25
yours from her, but I just love
32:27
all of his songs. They're so good.
32:30
Oh my God. When you hit that vape, you're
32:32
shaving your Husky. It's all
32:34
the high notes. Double D's. Everything's there.
32:36
Taking it from the rear. Which
32:41
every Patriot and Gatoriot knows is
32:43
your favorite way to take it.
32:47
100%. I mean, this is, I
32:49
like it. Talk about established science.
32:55
You don't even have to go to the Facebook hospital to figure that
32:57
out. No, you don't. You
32:59
absolutely do not. All right, Kylie. Last
33:01
one. All right. This one is
33:03
a grievance that we have gotten a
33:06
lot and never addressed. So this is
33:08
from J. Quellen. I
33:11
have fucking had it with these new
33:13
parents posting pictures on Instagram of their
33:15
babies and slapping a big
33:17
fucking emoji face on the baby's face to
33:19
protect their privacy. Now I get it. You
33:22
don't want your baby's face all over the
33:24
World Wide Web, but no one wants to
33:26
see a picture with an emoji over someone's
33:28
face. If you're
33:30
concerned about your child's privacy, then
33:33
don't fucking post that shit. Even if
33:35
your account's private, clearly you don't
33:37
trust your friends. Just save
33:39
that fucking picture and send it to Nanny
33:41
and Pappy. And that's
33:43
it. No one else needs to
33:46
see that shit. I have fucking had it. I've
33:50
had that same grievance. I'm like, even
33:52
if it's a big star, I'm like, a baby looks like that
33:55
picture for about 30 seconds. I mean, it goes so
33:57
fast. It's not like you're going to be able to.
34:00
to identify a baby
34:02
from any other baby they all look alike.
34:05
When they all look like newborns, there's nothing that
34:07
exciting about any of them. But I have noticed
34:09
the face thing. I'm just like, why
34:11
put the picture on there? What do you, why?
34:13
I've noticed the exact same thing. And
34:15
I think the exact same thing. Do
34:18
not post your baby
34:20
on the internet if you do
34:22
not want people to know what
34:24
your baby looks like. It's an
34:26
easy fix. It is the easiest
34:28
fix of all. It, I
34:31
mean, it's just, it's not even complicated. No.
34:33
I don't want you to see my baby, therefore I'm not putting my
34:36
baby on social media. Problem solved. You
34:38
know what I'm gonna start doing? I'm
34:40
gonna start posting pictures of you and me. I'm
34:43
gonna put a little emoji, a
34:45
Siberian husky emoji over
34:47
your face to protect
34:50
your, to protect your. To
34:56
protect your identity. Yeah. I
34:58
mean, it's seriously, it's so stupid.
35:01
It's, there is such an
35:03
easy fix for it. But to act like
35:06
your baby is so important
35:09
and you have to cover their identity with an
35:11
emoji, it's just, it's again,
35:14
another layer of
35:16
performative internet bullshit that if you
35:18
don't like that shit, then just
35:20
don't participate in it. Right. It's
35:23
so easy. It's just, I can't even
35:25
tell you how easy it is. And if somebody
35:27
doesn't want a picture of their kid on the
35:29
internet, I respect that. I totally get it. You're
35:31
the mom, you're the dad. Don't put the pic
35:33
of the kid on the internet. But
35:35
to kind of tease the kid
35:37
on the internet with a heart eye
35:40
emoji, I've had it. I've had
35:42
it. I've completely had it. And that's a great
35:44
one that we hadn't thought of. That is, it
35:46
is an absolutely fantastic
35:49
one. And I think there's an argument to
35:51
be made that like, you know, all of
35:53
these kids get all of these pictures put
35:55
on the internet of them without
35:58
their consent. I don't post my. kids
36:00
on my page that much because
36:02
now they're older and they don't care but they
36:05
would get I would put up an image up
36:07
and my kids would say when they were in
36:09
junior high high school I don't like that we
36:11
please take that down and I immediately would right
36:13
because it's you know
36:15
that's the right to not want to be on the
36:17
internet but yeah I think that's
36:20
that's crazy and I've seen this a lot recently
36:22
I'm like to you bitch you
36:24
live in Oklahoma City
36:27
you are not like
36:29
some dignitary undercover
36:31
covert spies kid no
36:33
that's nobody cares nobody
36:35
cares nobody cares nobody
36:38
cares but well I
36:40
would say I do
36:43
know a person that
36:45
always likes to point out ugly children
36:47
to me oh yeah that's true and
36:49
her name would
36:52
would be similar would be the exact
36:54
same person of America's greatest legal mind
36:57
is also you guys she
36:59
is sharp as a tack when it comes
37:01
to recognizing ugly kids were out and about
37:03
or an image yes now that kids ugly
37:08
kids not very care yeah all right
37:10
listener thanks for tuning in we're gonna
37:12
continue this conversation over
37:14
with our cult on
37:17
patreon pumps tell them we will see
37:19
you next Tuesday or Thursday or both I'm
37:27
out of it with that
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